ariadne

I’ve been eating healthily for the past two weeks now, and in some ways I imagine it showing - I’m not at all bloated, and my looks and feel soft. However - no weight loss, which I know shouldn’t be the primary goal, but it’s an obvious indicator that something is changing. I know it’s because I haven’t worked regular exercise into my life; I’m finding that very, very hard. I need to make the decision *today* to get up an hour earlier tomorrow morning (not hard, considering I sleep until quarter to nine) and go for a brisk walk/run. How hard can it be?! My eating is generally healthy now; except for the last 5 minutes, during which I’ve eaten 4 toffee crisp cookies.. but there you go. All I need to do is make exercise a routine. Easier said than done, clearly!

No an ounce lost - which is disheartening, considering I’ve cut out junk food completely, but not unusual. One of the reasons I always give up on diets is because it takes soooooo long to see the effects; especially considering that weight fluctuates a lot. I guess this is where exercise comes in! I was too exhausted from yesterday’s dissertation-writing to do anything but sleep, but tomorrow morning I’m going to start on my morning runs.

I handed my dissertation in, but the printer messed up and I missed out a few pages on one copy - and the department won’t let me add them in EVEN THOUGH they can check against the other copy to make sure I haven’t added anything in. They say it’s either 10% taken off for adding them in, or leave it as it is. I’m leaving it as it is, and my mark will probably suffer as a result. Assholes. Doesn’t matter - I don’t think it’ll mean much for my degree anyway. And I just want to get it over with. Really, really annoyed at myself. :/ Not in the least bit tempted to eat, and I desperately need some nutrients. >_

This isn’t really weight-related, but: I’m ALMOST done with my dissertation! I’ll be handing it in on Wednesday. I’m going to find it very hard not to have a barrel’s worth of celebratory beer - will try to stick to vodka on the rocks from a calorie point of view. Although on the other hand, if I’m running between pubs and dancing, maybe it won’t matter so much.

 Anyway - Friday is going to my Official Starting Day for exercise, and I’m going to run. Now, I tried running before, but I overdid it and hurt my knees. Can anyone tell me a little bit about how to start off? Distances, etc. I have a good pair of running shoes (went to a specialist store and everything), so I’m ready to go on that front.

Hardly at yesterday because I was travelling, and am doing really well today! Won’t be adding exercise in until after the 22nd (I STILL haven’t finished my dissertation…), but I’ve got some jogging routes mapped out already. Aiming to reach my mini goal by the middle of June at the latest.

It hasn’t been a very good day. It went well until about 16:00, when I had a handful of sweets. Clearly should have eaten a bigger lunch. Then had one and a half pieces of cake (Dad’s birthday) with a relatively large dinner - quite heavy on the Béarnaise. Considering that I’m not currently doing much exercise (I went for a 20 minute walk and did about 10 minutes of situps & leg exercises today), today feels like a bit of a failure. Have currently been up for almost 24 hours, too, on account of my dissertation. Keep telling myself that it’s because yesterday was my last day at home with the family before I go back, but if I start using that as an excuse I’ll find others to justify all sorts of eating/failure to exercise. Anyway - nevermind! Today is a new day, after all. Will stop writing at 9:00AM and have some breakfast - that’s in about 3.5 hours.

Had a bowl of WeightWatchers soup and an apple for lunch, and have since eaten a banana, two tomatoes, some salad, and a slice of low GI  bread. Having crayfish pasta salad this evening and am determined to have one small portion and not sit around picking at the serving dish when dinner is over. Found myself feeling quite hungry this afternoon, hence the slice of bread. Drinking lots of water to compensate, but my peckishness isn’t helped by the enormous number of words still to be written - around 5000, to be precise - by the 22nd . The pressure is making me stressed, and the feeling of “I can’t finish it” makes me want to do absolutely anything else - specifically, I want a slice of cake. Or two. I won’t, of course - I’ve just looked through about 40 ‘Before and After’ pictures and the thought of scoffing down unnecessary calories, whilst tempting, isn’t something I’m going to do. Also went for a brisk 15 minute walk up a hill as a break from staring at my word processor, so all in all the first proper day hasn’t been that bad! It’s difficult, though, especially whilst this dissertation is still hanging over my head. I’m in half a mind to take some caffeine pills and just power through until Sunday.

Starting the day with a bowl of müsli, some yogurt, and half a tumbler of orange juice to wash down my vitamins and the chrome I’m taking to help balance my blood sugars. Can’t really work exercise into my routine at the moment as I’m 1) at my parents’ house in Sweden (although we do go for a walk almost every afternoon) and 2) chin deep in extreme dissertation stress. I did wonder whether it was a good idea to start this before the hand-in date, but I figure if I can’t control what I eat in pressured circumstances, I’m not being very realistic.

Planning on hitting the 9000 word mark by tomorrow morning (all-nighters aren’t particularly healthy, but I haven’t got a choice) - after that it should all be smooth sailing. Really looking forward to making myself go for morning runs when I get back to England!

Day 1. Technically day 0.5, as did not join buddyslim.com until well into the afternoon. Have made crucial error of starting this diet (or lifestyle change, if all goes to plan) whilst sitting in a bakery, struggling to complete my history dissertation. The urge to eat several pastries in order to ease the pain of having to write 12,000 words by Wednesday the 22nd is enormous. On the plus side - I bought a gorgeous dress that I plan to wear to a party in late July and the thought of looking like a hippo in heels is acting as a superb deterrent! Has anyone had any success with using a Goal Dress to stay motivated?